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Saturday, May 8, 2010

More random thoughts...

I think blogging is really healthy, but sometimes I get annoyed because I don't know what I should put in my blog, and what to put in my journal.

I guess the only difference is that I blog to the world, and I write for myself, and for my future children and grandchildren to read, and see how lame I am.

I wonder how long I can keep this blog up for. I know people who have been blogging for 6 years...

I know I sound whiny and emo often, but I guess that is because when I'm not feeling that, I don't have the need to blog.

Other than the fact that I'm feeling like shit right now because I'm sick (again), I'm doing okay.

Today is my dad's birthday, and I can't help feeling guilty x 29347829374. I never knew what day my dad's birthday was, until last Monday, when my mom told me so. So basically, for the past unknown years, my family has celebrated everyone's birthday except for his. I feel really messed up.

Tomorrow is Mother's Day, and I feel bad as well because I'm putting more effort into my mom's day than Daddy's birthday. I picked roses for Mama today, and I'm setting up a rose bath for her tomorrow. My sister and I are also baking her some peanut butter cookies. AS for my dad, I really didn't get him anything. My brother-in-law was the only one who did shit for him. Colosseum is baking a loquat pie right now, and giving him some adapter-cord-technology-that-i-don't-know-about thing.

I'm always feeling guilty about something =/ but I should, because I am a very sad person.

My life has been really changed this year.
Gosh it's unbelievable. I don't want this school year to end. GAH. I'M 14 HOLY LDSKFHWE. So many important people will be leaving me in June. And they're all going for something. They are all trying to achieve something, that I don't know about, while I'm staying at home, going on with my life without moving towards something that I really want. What do I want?

Life is short. I try to live it as best as possible now, but I can't help regretting not appreciating life more as a kid, when I had less responsibilities and worries and crap...

OKAY I'M GOING TO STOP FEELING SORRY FOR MYSELF AND GO TELL DADDY I REMEMBERED HIS BIRTHDAY.

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